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Sort of similar Hashemite kingdom of jordan Peterson, in that the people who need it most can really benefit from it, simply well-adjusted humans will find it kind of gross.
Entry level "Win Friends and Influence People" pop psych with a greasy Machiavellian undertone that makes you lot want to launder your hands.Sort of similar Jordan Peterson, in that the people who need it most can actually benefit from it, but well-adapted humans will find it kind of gross.
...moreI similar to read a lot of social psychology stuff, and this one is... all of the social psychology presented quickly and easily.
There was nothing new or super interesting in here, just the basics:
Observe out what people are passionate about and get them talking nearly it.
Don't simply practice squeamish thi
I similar to read a lot of social psychology stuff, and this one is... all of the social psychology presented rapidly and hands.
There was zero new or super interesting in hither, just the basics:
Find out what people are passionate most and go them talking about it.
Don't just do nice things for others, let them do nice things for you.
Stay nowadays and visible.
Listen. Pay attention. Remember details and events.
Discover common interests and talk about those things.
Open up up and share details about your life, maybe even if information technology is a little TMI.
And for the love of all that is good and amazing:
RECIPROCATE RECIPROCATE RECIPROCATE.
...moreLeaving the aspect of it making you lot more likable bated - I liked information technology for, it explored various psychological and behavioral aspects of human actions we encounter on a day to day basis. It is thought provoking and many ideas discussed engage us to think about them side by side time we are in such situations and either take advantage of them or neutrally study them with better consciousness
I recollect one of the major takeaways of this book is that it says that "Relationships and friendships are happiest when in that location is parity". I wholeheartedly hold with this.
Example: My friend lives on the province and I live on the capital. She ever makes the effort to coming here and because she is used to doing and so I have it for granted. Next fourth dimension, try to become to the providence or jus
Sometimes yous wonder why some people don't like you and with this book you volition probably effigy out the reason why.I think one of the major takeaways of this volume is that it says that "Relationships and friendships are happiest when in that location is parity". I wholeheartedly agree with this.
Case: My friend lives on the province and I live on the uppercase. She always makes the effort to coming here and because she is used to doing so I take it for granted. Adjacent time, try to become to the providence or just evidence her in a way that y'all are thankful she came all this style to visit you.
This book has nice little tips such as to not stereotype. We are all iii-dimentional, complex creatures and one of my favourites is to attempt to agree on the small things. I never realized how important that was till now.
At the finish of the book it has a cheat sheet where there is a resume of every chapter. Quick read and you lot'll probably find something useful that you'll want to apply to y'all daily life.
...moreIn sum: Impressions are largely subconscious, and applied psychology is useful to aid bond with, convince, and entreatment to others.
Summary of author'due south communication:
Influence mood
Beingness up positive retention to associate it with you
James-Lange theory:
Emotions ascend from concrete arousal
To read people & make up one's mind mood:
Body lang, ask questions of activity & approximate excitement
Enemy to friend
Ben Franklin outcome:
Request
In sum: Impressions are largely hidden, and practical psychology is useful to help bond with, convince, and appeal to others.
Summary of writer's advice:
Influence mood
Beingness up positive memory to associate it with you
James-Lange theory:
Emotions ascend from physical arousal
To read people & determine mood:
Body lang, inquire questions of activity & gauge excitement
Enemy to friend
Ben Franklin outcome:
Request favors to turn enemies into friends
Mechanism: cerebral noise
And show you lot generally practise people favors
Don't repay favors immediately, as that'southward transactional
Balanced give & take
Subconscious accounting of value of friendships (largely emotional)
Aim for counterbalanced requite and have:
just note that we overestimate our own contributions
Friends don't like being in debt or feeling used
Interim like a skillful friend
Positive transference, uses template thinking
Act similar a good friend:
inside jokes, emo intimacy & support
Faux it till yous make it
Negotiations
Reframe offers to emphasize what they value, so they think they win (platinum rule)
Basis in the door technique: constitute agreement
Door in face technique: dissimilarity creates humor, but risks outrage
Instant bonding
Mirroring: trunk lang, parlance
Ask questions to notice deeper commonalities
Trust
Mere exposure effect:
Repeated exposures establish trust
But depends on level of interaction
Eg rule of seven in advertising
To enter inner circle: Stimulus-value-role theory
Stimulus: bonny
Value: belonging
Role: activities together, eg roadtrips
Endearment
Perfection elicits insecurity and envy, while flaws humanize
Show vulnerability, especially in dating
Pratfall issue:
Foibles endear usa to others, every bit they feel more at ease & less judged
Reactance
Opposite psychology:
Use need for autonomy, taboo things are more desirable
Using devil'southward advocate to convince:
Argue for otherside with weak arguments, alluding to stronger arguments for own side
Leadership
Virtually would rather follow than lead
Dissimilar emotional leadership styles:
Visionary leader: for indecisive moments
To convince experienced people: invite to tabular array
Coaching leaders: vs micromanaging
Affiliative leader: seeks team bonding
Democratic: process oriented
Footstep setting: for competent people seeking motivation
Commanding: for crisis
Deter Stereotyping
Provide life details, oversharing makes you 3D
Classical conditioning: associate positive feeling with yous
Exist a positive presence (joyful, optimistic)
Compliment others naturally, & bring nutrient / what they like
Credibility
Is context dependent
Appeal your by exp & qualifications,
Testify you lot care,
Show similarity (dress, parlance, mother tongue)
Exist believing (preempt & destroy counter arguments)
Use social proof: introductions bridge trust as others vouch for yous
Destroyers: contradiction, hesitance & exact tics, caught telling lies
When in doubt, leave it out: say "I don't know", or "I'll get back to you"
Don't overqualfiy, eg. "i estimate"
Don't be overly polite
Winning over the majority
Use group dynamics / herd behavior
Factors of persuasion: size of majority, closeness & important to you
implicit leaders, focus on influencers vs trying to be everything to everyone
Identify by noting who's taking initiative & who everyone looks to
I also cannot consider it as a novel source of information, the kind of book I would read, cherish, possibly annotate, cite in an argument, but never recommend to the lay reader because, bluntly, it's not written for that. This isn't original enquiry. The author isn't a researcher, so far equally I can see. They're presenting canned data from other fields and from other books, several of which I've read (side note: Cialdini is less Cee-al-dee-knee and more Ch-e-all-dee-genu, audiobook reader).
It'south worth a read, I suppose, but I'thou not going out of my fashion here to tout its benefits. It gets four stars for not having any grievous errors in chunking the data.
...moreLike shooting fish in a barrel breezy to use. Information technology's okay clear understandable and easy way to get what yous need to get liked. I choose this rating course i know the material and it'south completely worth it.
Easy breezy to utilize. It's okay clear understandable and easy way to get what y'all need to get liked. I cull this rating course i know the fabric and it'southward completely worth it.Easy breezy to use. Information technology's okay articulate understandable and piece of cake way to become what you need to get liked. I choose this rating course i know the textile and it'southward completely worth information technology.
...moreVery good book for beginners, atleast you can create good perception for you or credence by the people but while going forward you lot need more subtle techniques to cleft them up, Y'all NEED TO INFLUENCE PEOPLE IN ORDER TO ATTRACT THEM, stick to this fact and practise your acts, and commencement with this book.
Good materials though.
Interesting studies, but it's presented in a very robotic manner. That makes it a petty boring to read. More than like reading a research paper, than reading a book that I tin can relate to.Good materials though.
...moreInformation technology has given summaries to quick psychological facts and methods.
It'south a wonderful book.Information technology has given summaries to quick psychological facts and methods.
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