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 · 553 ratings  · 56 reviews
Start your review of The Science of Likability: Charm, Wit, Humor, and the sixteen Studies That Testify Y'all How To Chief Them
Bastard Travel
Entry level "Win Friends and Influence People" pop psych with a greasy Machiavellian undertone that makes you desire to wash your easily.

Sort of similar Hashemite kingdom of jordan Peterson, in that the people who need it most can really benefit from it, simply well-adjusted humans will find it kind of gross.

Entry level "Win Friends and Influence People" pop psych with a greasy Machiavellian undertone that makes you lot want to launder your hands.

Sort of similar Jordan Peterson, in that the people who need it most can actually benefit from it, but well-adapted humans will find it kind of gross.

...more
Khanh Ngo
Aug thirteen, 2015 rated information technology information technology was astonishing
How to become more amiable? The book covers a range of sections where you can amend your likability, backed with relevant scientific and psychological researches. The message I swallowed later on reading this motivating volume? "Fake it until you become it". Highly recommend for introverted people who prefer to be likeable..quietly. How to become more affable? The book covers a range of sections where yous can improve your likability, backed with relevant scientific and psychological researches. The message I swallowed after reading this motivating book? "Fake it until you lot become it". Highly recommend for introverted people who prefer to be likeable..quietly. ...more
Benas Aukstikalnis
Well... Author likes dogs more than cats so there is no way I am giving him more than 3 stars. Other than that it was fun, brusk book. Oasis't learned almost anything new. Notwithstanding, not a bad book. Probably could of used more examples or something. It'south weird because I mostly hate books that use too many examples, it'due south 1 of the few times in which state of affairs is the contrary, it uses too few. Well... Writer likes dogs more than cats then there is no way I am giving him more than 3 stars. Other than that it was fun, short book. Oasis't learned almost annihilation new. Still, non a bad book. Probably could of used more examples or something. It's weird considering I mostly hate books that use too many examples, it's one of the few times in which situation is the opposite, it uses besides few. ...more than
James
Nov 25, 2019 rated it liked it
I believe I got this ebook really inexpensive or for free on Amazon a few years back, and I had a short 80 minute belatedly night flying where my Kindle Paperwhite'south calorie-free upwardly display would be nice, so this one fit the bill.

I similar to read a lot of social psychology stuff, and this one is... all of the social psychology presented quickly and easily.

There was nothing new or super interesting in here, just the basics:

Observe out what people are passionate about and get them talking nearly it.
Don't simply practice squeamish thi

I believe I got this ebook actually cheap or for costless on Amazon a few years back, and I had a curt 80 infinitesimal tardily night flight where my Kindle Paperwhite's low-cal up display would be prissy, then this one fit the bill.

I similar to read a lot of social psychology stuff, and this one is... all of the social psychology presented rapidly and hands.

There was zero new or super interesting in hither, just the basics:

Find out what people are passionate most and go them talking about it.
Don't just do nice things for others, let them do nice things for you.
Stay nowadays and visible.
Listen. Pay attention. Remember details and events.
Discover common interests and talk about those things.
Open up up and share details about your life, maybe even if information technology is a little TMI.

And for the love of all that is good and amazing:

RECIPROCATE RECIPROCATE RECIPROCATE.

...more
Vishwanath

Leaving the aspect of it making you lot more likable bated - I liked information technology for, it explored various psychological and behavioral aspects of human actions we encounter on a day to day basis. It is thought provoking and many ideas discussed engage us to think about them side by side time we are in such situations and either take advantage of them or neutrally study them with better consciousness
Alex Tumanoff
This is a very simple volume. Y'all can get some ideas about how to behave yourself in typical situation. The main problem with tips from this book is that the about ideas are so little. Overall the volume is worse a try, but exercise not pivot much hopes on it.
Agostina
Sometimes you wonder why some people don't like you and with this volume you will probably figure out the reason why.

I recollect one of the major takeaways of this book is that it says that "Relationships and friendships are happiest when in that location is parity". I wholeheartedly hold with this.

Example: My friend lives on the province and I live on the capital. She ever makes the effort to coming here and because she is used to doing and so I have it for granted. Next fourth dimension, try to become to the providence or jus

Sometimes yous wonder why some people don't like you and with this book you volition probably effigy out the reason why.

I think one of the major takeaways of this volume is that it says that "Relationships and friendships are happiest when in that location is parity". I wholeheartedly agree with this.

Case: My friend lives on the province and I live on the uppercase. She always makes the effort to coming here and because she is used to doing so I take it for granted. Adjacent time, try to become to the providence or just evidence her in a way that y'all are thankful she came all this style to visit you.

This book has nice little tips such as to not stereotype. We are all iii-dimentional, complex creatures and one of my favourites is to attempt to agree on the small things. I never realized how important that was till now.

At the finish of the book it has a cheat sheet where there is a resume of every chapter. Quick read and you lot'll probably find something useful that you'll want to apply to y'all daily life.

...more
lieberries
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view information technology, click here. A concise and applied guide to beingness likabile. Each advice has some psych studies bankroll it.

In sum: Impressions are largely subconscious, and applied psychology is useful to aid bond with, convince, and entreatment to others.

Summary of author'due south communication:
Influence mood
Beingness up positive retention to associate it with you

James-Lange theory:
Emotions ascend from concrete arousal

To read people & make up one's mind mood:
Body lang, ask questions of activity & approximate excitement
Enemy to friend
Ben Franklin outcome:
Request

A curtailed and practical guide to being likabile. Each communication has some psych studies backing it.

In sum: Impressions are largely hidden, and practical psychology is useful to help bond with, convince, and appeal to others.

Summary of writer's advice:
Influence mood
Beingness up positive memory to associate it with you

James-Lange theory:
Emotions ascend from physical arousal

To read people & determine mood:
Body lang, inquire questions of activity & gauge excitement
Enemy to friend
Ben Franklin outcome:
Request favors to turn enemies into friends
Mechanism: cerebral noise

And show you lot generally practise people favors
Don't repay favors immediately, as that'southward transactional
Balanced give & take
Subconscious accounting of value of friendships (largely emotional)

Aim for counterbalanced requite and have:
just note that we overestimate our own contributions
Friends don't like being in debt or feeling used
Interim like a skillful friend
Positive transference, uses template thinking
Act similar a good friend:
inside jokes, emo intimacy & support
Faux it till yous make it
Negotiations
Reframe offers to emphasize what they value, so they think they win (platinum rule)
Basis in the door technique: constitute agreement
Door in face technique: dissimilarity creates humor, but risks outrage
Instant bonding
Mirroring: trunk lang, parlance
Ask questions to notice deeper commonalities
Trust
Mere exposure effect:
Repeated exposures establish trust
But depends on level of interaction
Eg rule of seven in advertising

To enter inner circle: Stimulus-value-role theory
Stimulus: bonny
Value: belonging
Role: activities together, eg roadtrips
Endearment
Perfection elicits insecurity and envy, while flaws humanize

Show vulnerability, especially in dating

Pratfall issue:
Foibles endear usa to others, every bit they feel more at ease & less judged
Reactance
Opposite psychology:
Use need for autonomy, taboo things are more desirable

Using devil'southward advocate to convince:
Argue for otherside with weak arguments, alluding to stronger arguments for own side
Leadership
Virtually would rather follow than lead

Dissimilar emotional leadership styles:
Visionary leader: for indecisive moments
To convince experienced people: invite to tabular array
Coaching leaders: vs micromanaging
Affiliative leader: seeks team bonding
Democratic: process oriented
Footstep setting: for competent people seeking motivation
Commanding: for crisis
Deter Stereotyping
Provide life details, oversharing makes you 3D

Classical conditioning: associate positive feeling with yous
Exist a positive presence (joyful, optimistic)
Compliment others naturally, & bring nutrient / what they like
Credibility
Is context dependent
Appeal your by exp & qualifications,
Testify you lot care,
Show similarity (dress, parlance, mother tongue)
Exist believing (preempt & destroy counter arguments)

Use social proof: introductions bridge trust as others vouch for yous

Destroyers: contradiction, hesitance & exact tics, caught telling lies
When in doubt, leave it out: say "I don't know", or "I'll get back to you"
Don't overqualfiy, eg. "i estimate"
Don't be overly polite
Winning over the majority
Use group dynamics / herd behavior
Factors of persuasion: size of majority, closeness & important to you
implicit leaders, focus on influencers vs trying to be everything to everyone
Identify by noting who's taking initiative & who everyone looks to

...more
Shhhhh Ahhhhh
Jul 08, 2018 rated it really liked it
How to evaluate this book? I'm always stuck on the contend about books like these. As a primer on the discipline, I discover it defective. I'm not saying that I know a better primer on the subject of 'likability', because I'm not certain I've plant a book that meets the subjects of regular persuasion, instant influence, getting people to like y'all, converting enemies, negotiating, etc, at the same time. Rather, on the scale in my head of books that are good primers on their respective subjects due to intangibl How to evaluate this book? I'm ever stuck on the fence virtually books like these. As a primer on the field of study, I discover information technology lacking. I'1000 not saying that I know a better primer on the subject of 'likability', considering I'1000 not sure I've constitute a book that meets the subjects of regular persuasion, instant influence, getting people to like you, converting enemies, negotiating, etc, at the same time. Rather, on the scale in my caput of books that are proficient primers on their respective subjects due to intangibles like depth gone into the field of study, tools given, efficiency of content commitment, quality of references, novelty and total aggregate utility, this book does non stand upwardly as a shining beacon. I'll recommend it only because I have nil amend to recommend on this specific subject (niche as it is) just I'm far from satisfied with it.

I also cannot consider it as a novel source of information, the kind of book I would read, cherish, possibly annotate, cite in an argument, but never recommend to the lay reader because, bluntly, it's not written for that. This isn't original enquiry. The author isn't a researcher, so far equally I can see. They're presenting canned data from other fields and from other books, several of which I've read (side note: Cialdini is less Cee-al-dee-knee and more Ch-e-all-dee-genu, audiobook reader).

It'south worth a read, I suppose, but I'thou not going out of my fashion here to tout its benefits. It gets four stars for not having any grievous errors in chunking the data.

...more
Jacob Bailey
Oct 13, 2017 rated it really liked information technology
Not a bad book, the author says himself this book works peachy to tie together a lot of concepts that yous have likely seen before and works to embed them into your subconscious. There was nonetheless plenty of things in here that will brand a ton of sense in retrospect, however you lot won't have given them too much thought otherwise. I'll be looking back through this book any time I would like to further consolidate the information. Information technology's easy enough to re-read and remind yourself of the information. Non a bad book, the author says himself this book works corking to necktie together a lot of concepts that y'all have probable seen before and works to embed them into your hidden. There was still enough of things in here that will make a ton of sense in retrospect, withal you lot won't have given them also much thought otherwise. I'll exist looking dorsum through this volume whatsoever time I would like to further consolidate the information. It's like shooting fish in a barrel enough to re-read and remind yourself of the information. ...more
David Kuntschik
I need ALL of Rex'south books peculiarly after reading this. Unfortunately, I'll demand to read it once more to record his practice exercises. One was regarding charisma. He said people that respond kickoff whether right or wrong were perceived equally charismatic for the their confidence. He suggested free association, open up a book, any page, point to a discussion and rattle off 5 things to come up to your mind. This volition build your ability to free associate when presented with a question. I demand ALL of King's books specially subsequently reading this. Unfortunately, I'll need to read it again to record his practise exercises. One was regarding charisma. He said people that reply offset whether right or wrong were perceived as charismatic for the their confidence. He suggested complimentary association, open a book, whatever page, point to a give-and-take and rattle off v things to come up to your heed. This will build your ability to gratuitous associate when presented with a question. ...more than
Marc Mueller
The writing mode of the book comes across like a term paper. Not having page numbers further added to that impression. Each chapter comes with a brief surface level reference to scientific studies, but across these mentions, there appears to be little substance. I found information technology difficult to find any content engaging, and in the contrary felt queasy well-nigh some of the deadline manipulative implications.
Juan Jose Rodriguez Velez
Easy breezy to use. It'due south okay articulate understandable and easy mode to go what yous need to get liked. I cull this rating course i know the cloth and information technology's completely worth it.

Like shooting fish in a barrel breezy to use. Information technology's okay clear understandable and easy way to get what yous need to get liked. I choose this rating course i know the material and it'south completely worth it.

Easy breezy to utilize. It's okay clear understandable and easy way to get what y'all need to get liked. I cull this rating course i know the fabric and it'southward completely worth it.

Easy breezy to use. Information technology's okay articulate understandable and piece of cake way to become what you need to get liked. I choose this rating course i know the textile and it'southward completely worth information technology.

...more
Kristen
January 25, 2018 rated information technology it was ok
There were some interesting ideas in this book, only overall I did not like the language of this volume. I felt similar I was studying how to dispense people and it didn't experience right. I got through one-half of it and, regardless of beingness told by the author in the book that this wasn't manipulation, I couldn't get over it. Maybe I will pick it upward again sometime, but I am done for now. There were some interesting ideas in this book, just overall I did not similar the language of this book. I felt similar I was studying how to manipulate people and information technology didn't experience right. I got through half of it and, regardless of existence told by the author in the book that this wasn't manipulation, I couldn't get over it. Maybe I volition pick it up once again sometime, just I am done for now. ...more
Yogi Pote
Sep 07, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Sweet and Simple

Very good book for beginners, atleast you can create good perception for you or credence by the people but while going forward you lot need more subtle techniques to cleft them up, Y'all NEED TO INFLUENCE PEOPLE IN ORDER TO ATTRACT THEM, stick to this fact and practise your acts, and commencement with this book.

Kathleen Dragan
Quick read, perchance a few useful nuggets about how we are perceived past others. Though this isn't straight specified in the book, all social norms addressed are very American/Western European in nature.
Daniel Aguilar
Dainty and quick review of many pop ideas used nowadays in marketing, politics, and self-help literature along with some of the studies backing their validity. Shallow and simplistic, of course, but skilful enough as a quick review.
Jackie
Apr 07, 2018 rated it really liked it
Hey, a really interesting and helpful book. I would experience a footling as if I were cheating if I willfully took these findings and tried to apply to every day situations. Most of them, however, are behaviors that are what you would practise anyway if you only knew. Worthwhile!
Luis
Interesting studies, just information technology'due south presented in a very robotic manner. That makes it a trivial dull to read. More like reading a enquiry paper, than reading a book that I can relate to.

Good materials though.

Interesting studies, but it's presented in a very robotic manner. That makes it a petty boring to read. More than like reading a research paper, than reading a book that I tin can relate to.

Good materials though.

...more
Jeff
Jun 18, 2019 rated it information technology was ok
This book cleanly presents some interesting (though sometimes smarmy) tips. But there's a lot of filler for a short book, and information technology's not clear how well the suggestions are extrapolated from the scientific discipline.
Pouya Etemadi
Sep thirteen, 2017 rated it it was astonishing
It'south a expert volume nearly ways to become more likable. It's non very deep and practical but however you lot can learn good things. It's a proficient volume about ways to become more likable. It's not very deep and applied but yet you can learn good things. ...more
Zais
Nov 03, 2017 rated it really liked information technology
Another book about things everybody know already.
Andrea Greene
Good read for psychology majors and degree holders.
Abe
Jan 27, 2018 rated it it was ok
Dale Carnegie with the depth and thoughtfulness replaced past the pretense of scientific discipline. Spoiler: no science in this book.
Brian
February 26, 2018 rated it did not like information technology
A better title would be, "A Psychopath's Guide to Humans."
Petr1108
Boni
Feb 24, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Information technology's a wonderful book.

Information technology has given summaries to quick psychological facts and methods.

It'south a wonderful book.

Information technology has given summaries to quick psychological facts and methods.

...more
Olivia Bray
I genuinely felt this volume was written by Dwight Schrute on how to get friends. that'south how technical, inauthentic, and slightly manipulative this felt to me. thank u, next.
Jamison Johnson
Audio version tin be likewise much similar merely reading vs communicating. A better vocalization thespian would help.

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